Good for you if you’ve already written out your list of resolutions, and you’ll be just about average if you end up abandoning most of the list by the second week in January. Perhaps you no longer bother with a list or, on the opposite end of the spectrum, you make the same giant, vague and seemingly impossible goal that remains impossible due to the way you go about it.
This is the year I’ll overcome paruresis!
As noble and well-intentioned your colossal goal may be, it may still go nowhere unless you devise a way to conquer it with success.
Big Goals Can Lead to Big Failure
Setting a goal to overcome paruresis gives you vague aim that can be hard to meet since it’s equally as tough to define. Other goals that fall into such a category include things like get healthy, get rich and get a chateau in France. Well, the France example is fairly concrete but vague in the sense that it offers no concrete plan to follow to obtain such an estate.
Obtaining that French chateau, getting healthy, rich, and overcoming your paruresis will work better if you break it down into a series of smaller steps. You can still leave overcoming your paruresis as the overall aim, but you’ll have a better chance of hitting your big target if you have smaller, concrete targets to hit.
Game Plan
Your game plan for achieving an overall goal works bests if you break it down into a series of steps that are both realistic and achievable. A goal such as overcoming shy bladder, for example, can be more effective if you outline a series of steps you can implement into your daily life. Perhaps your first small step can be reading up on the condition to see what type of research has been done and what shy bladder help and recovery programs are already available.
You might then want to set up other small steps that send you in your desired direction. Perhaps you want to check out one of the shy bladder remedies you run across, join an online discussion or support group, or start journaling about your own anxieties and fears that are fueling your paruresis.
Breaking down your overall goal into manageable and achievable steps is like eating small bites from an apple rather than stuffing the whole piece of fruit in your mouth. Creating a series of realistic goals also means you’ll be less likely to be overwhelmed, more likely to tackle each step and have more opportunities to reward yourself.
Job Well Done
Rewarding yourself after you’ve achieved even the smallest step toward a larger goal keeps the positive vibe going with a well-deserved pat on the back. Rewards can be anything that makes you feel good, as long as they don’t work against your overall goal. For instance, don’t reward yourself with a chocolate cake after meeting your goal of eating raw veggies for snacks all day.
Rewards can be something as simple as a nature hike, giving yourself an hour off from your cell phone or taking a bubble bath. Maybe it’s a pedicure or extended playtime with your kids and pets or a get-together with friends. Little things can mean a lot when it comes to conquering small portions of a larger goal and letting yourself know you’re kicking butt while doing it.
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